Who's A Winner At The Crying Game? ... Cynthia is!

I've been on a roller coaster ride of emotions. Everything was a tearjerker for me this weekend. I've never been the type to not have my feelings in check, but I literally had no idea when and if I was going to cry. That is a strange feeling.

I did a lot of crying in public. In bathrooms. In my room. In my friend's room and I think that's about it. But I had no tears today guys, so I'm obviously back to normal. I think the magnitude of my situation all hit me at once. In front of everyone at work. That was embarrassing.

I've moved across the country. My only friend has her own life going on. I have no friends ha and I can only talk to my family at random intervals during the daylight hours because of the time difference. I've just been lonely and overwhelmed. Being at a job that I'm not happy with doesn't help.

I don't want to sound like an entitled bitch, but I'm about to. I'm a college graduate. I'm working with high schoolers. Getting paid the same as high schoolers. That does a lot to your ego slash self worth. So finding a new job is a major to do for me BUT I know what kind of job I want and that job is in LA, so I'll have to settle for something boring. Ugh. If you know a super cool company in the Bay Area that's hiring, holla at your girl.

Besides crying all weekend, I walked around town a lot, found a couple of cool bars that I hope to become a regular at and I decided that I'm going to politely stalk the local independent filmmakers in this town.

Also I got this in a fortune cookie, so I must be headed in the right direction.

Reach For Gold!

I met this gentleman at the bus stop who told me to plan and follow my dreams. So, I will!

He gave me a bunch of advice (people in Oakland are so cool and open without seeking anything in return, at least that's how it seems to a big eyed Easterner like myself) and he left me with this quote...

"He who fails to plan is planning to fail." We can thank good ole Winston Churchill for that one. I'm gonna listen to my bus stop guardian angel and Churchill, slow my role and really get my shit together, itemized and all that good stuff. Get my focus and passion and drive back. Gonna do some short and long term goal writing tonight.

Hear my roar!

Week Two Recap

The past few days have melted into one huge swirl of not having to be at work slash not having new friends slash internet networking slash reading Game of Thrones slash watching Netflix slash strolling around town slash avoiding writing. Why avoiding? Because that's what I do best!

I either need real structure in my life or I need to know that I'm on an endless vacation that is fully covered financially. I don't know how to act otherwise!

Pics of when I was around town. I'll spare you the pics of my extreme boredom :)

Taco trucks are a blessing from God. Thank you, God. 

I saw Fruitvale Station, a film based on a true Oakland story at the local theater. Awesome theater, awesome story, so many people crying in the audience. Myself included. It was crazy leaving the theater and walking by some of the places spotlighted in the film. 

Selfie, strolling around town. Awesome sunglasses were a gift from Brittany, been wearing them everyday to protect my delicate eyes from this strong California sun.

I also broke my crying seal this week, as predicted. It was much needed and came and went very quickly. Moving on y'all! 

Monterey, CA

What a weekend! I didn't have to slave away at work, so I decided to hop on a Greyhound bus and head a couple hours south to Monterey, CA to visit one of my dearest friends, Alexis. The Greyhound bus was an experience in and of itself, which definitely made me realize I NEED A CAR. But that battle will be fought another day.

My friend Alexis is the best for many reasons. We haven't seen each other in years, but she's still super smart, super athletic and the best person to go on dates with. I swear we had the most romantic weekend of all time. I'm exaggerating, but it was pretty damn good. Alexis and I would make the best girlfriends, take notes guys. We're also going to do The Amazing Race together some day, take notes Amazing Race slash email me at cadarkwa@gmail.com if you'd like to book us today.

Alexis and I go to the cutest Italian cafes and have the cutest convos about our futures and love and life and careers and travel. Look at her little cup and my big cup. Cute!

Then we eat a lot at said cafes.

We sight see at beautiful places like Big Sur, even when it's foggy. Alexis told me not to google Big Sur because I'd see the craziest most beautiful sunny place in the world. She was right. Don't google it or return in real life when it's sunny. Putting that on my to do list. This is also a place that lent many writers like Jack Kerouac inspiration. Give me inspirational love, Big Sur!

We take long scenic drives while listening to Maroon 5, Passion Pit, Lauryn Hill and Adele. We also visit towns called Carmel-By-The-Sea. That's a real place and a real name. What? Awesome.

And we travel the world with our mouths. From Italy to France to Japan to Mexico, only because we can't take our physical bodies to those beautiful countries at the moment.

In conclusion, I wish I could be on vacation forever. Eating, walking, talking, looking, breathing and enjoying my life. Back in Oakland now, more determined than ever to be rich so I can live that vacation life in my near future. Ya feel me?

Thoughtful Bike Rides

I've had a very thoughtful day. Finished packing, stepped my resume and cover letter game up, then I met up with a friend from Savannah. He let me borrow a bike so we biked around town, the weather was perfecto, the streets were clear and my legs pumped very slowly. I'm giving myself a month to have the leg power to ride up the steep hill to my new place. I had to walk half of it today. It was a sad sight.

Anyways, we rode around downtown Oakland and into the Temescal area of Oakland, which is very hip. I hate using the term "hip" but sometimes there's no other way to describe a vibe or place.

During my lovely bike tour, the discussion turned to future goals and the necessary steps needed to reach those goals. My next step is definitely to find a new job, whether that job is here in the Bay Area or in LA is to be determined.

My current job isn't terrible. It gave me the opportunity to transition to Oakland with some security but it definitely isn't where I want to be for the long run. I'm going to make seeking other jobs a priority in the next few weeks. I want to spend my day in an environment where I can use my brain again, solve problems, read and write. Can I get paid for that? Will you pay me for that? Do dreams come true?

What I'm Doing Today

I'm unpacking today and when I say the place I'm living in is a California dream, I mean it. But, I'm such a 21st Century girl that I'm about to YouTube how to use these hangers. They were a contraption created to confuse and confuddle me. 

I won't even tell you about the battle I had with an old school corkscrew the other night. We'll just say the corkscrew won. 

Update: I think I'm just slow and using the hanger is very straightforward, I was simply intimidated by the old time design of it. Hanger 1, Cynthia 0.

My Poll -------->

Don't forget to take part in the poll! My first week in the Bay Area has been a shower of hate on SoCal so I'm interested in your opinions on the debate.

View From My Street

This hill kills me everyday. My thighs will love it later right?

MD to CA: Week One

It's been a crazy week y'all. I arrived, I conquered and I'm still here.

San Francisco is as chilly as everyone says, so make sure to step your sweater game up if you plan to visit. I did not heed the warnings. I haven't been freezing but I'm the type that would rather sweat than shiver. Is everyone else like that? I take a sweater with me as often as possible, during summer in swampy D.C., so I won't lie, I was suffering in silence when I first landed in windy San Francisco.

Since then, I've adjusted to the weather, among other things. I found a great place to live in Oakland and in a record three days. I guess I was supposed to be suffering and struggling upon arrival but it's been a calm transition thus far. I definitely feel like I've been making the right decisions, but it can be very overwhelming at times. I think I'll cry week two or three, I'm going to try to hold out until four. I'll keep you updated.

My number one enemy at the moment: California hills. My legs have been worked out more in the past week than in the whole ten months I spent in suburban Maryland. It didn't help that those were probably the laziest ten months of my life, but damn, I wish I had been better prepared physically to be a Californian. Everyone runs and is super fit here, so I hope walking these hills will get me on that status. Main goal: to wear a crop top. When do I plan on doing that? I have no idea.

Anyways, welcome to the blog. I'll be posting as often and randomly as possible with updates on life, my stern East Coast opinion on these Westerners and my plans on world domination via writing, smiling, laughing and charming the silly people I meet. I just want to be rich some day without having to sell my body. Love ya if I know ya and love ya if I don't.